Neculai Fantanaru

Everything Depends On The Leader

Survival Mission

On March 11, 2009
, in
Leadership Y4-Titanium by Neculai Fantanaru

Help people externalize things they hide in themselves, without falling under their power.

On New Year’s Eve, a man was sitting in a bar, looking at his cup of drink. He was sitting like that for over half an hour, when a brawler truck driver comes near him, takes his drink and drinks it up.

The man starts crying, and the driver tells him:

- Come on now, I was just kidding. Calm down, I’ll buy you another drink. I simply cannot stand to see a man crying.

- But that’s not why I am crying. This is the worst day of my life. First, I overslept and got late to work. My boss got furious and fired me. When I left the building to get in my car, I discovered that it had been stolen. The police said they could not do anything. Having no choice, I took a taxi back home. After I got off the taxi, I realized that I forgot in it my wallet and my credit cards, but it was too late. I went into the house and, when I got into the bedroom, I found my wife in bed with the gardener. Eventually, I left home and entered this bar. And, just when I was thinking to end my life, you have appeared and have drunk my poison.

Leadership: Does the image with which you present yourself in the world change its angle of view as it passes from one person to another, without taking into account anything other than your own unavailability to attach yourself to something destined to change?

The goal of a leader is to lead people, and for that, he must produce a noticeable change in their lives. His impact is even greater as people’s change is more significant. The biggest problem is that, if you do not know when and how to intervene in people’s lives, you may have a surprise – to get a strong strike below the belt. Namely, instead of you changing them, they will end up changing you. You may suddenly wake up in a position of subordination, while others take full control over your destiny.

Do you let your guard down when you expand your influence? Do you want to get in the truck driver’s place, which had alone “poisoned” himself because of his unexpected involvement in people’s lives?

When you aim at the people’s core, when you intervene in their lives, make sure to never let your guard down, to never turn into a victim of your own ridiculous excesses of interference into their lives. Before sending them your own vision, first strive to deeply understand their essence. You will fall under their power if the impact of your leadership does not precede a very good understanding of the feelings filling their lives.

Help people externalize things they hide in themselves, without falling under their power of influence. The viewing angle of your image corresponds to the plans of the people around you when what displays your personality (especially the physiognomy of your face) agrees with their aspiration, their status, their preferences for change.

Just as a doctor, who faces a patient whose disease he can’t determine, reads avidly about it, looking for reports of cases of other patients with similar symptoms – so you, when you deal with people whose feelings, thoughts, psychological conditions you can’t determine or you haven’t understood very well, must resist the desire to suddenly create an impact in their lives.

Try to restrain your urge to enter unexpectedly in people’s lives, until you feel confident enough about what they are feeling.

The Survival Mission expresses metaphorically the dimension of your leadership. Having an impact in people’s lives means knowing how to respond to their attack; you must conceal your intention, and on other occasions, you simply must not involve at all. Your leadership can turn into a threat even against you and can drain all your power if you follow those decisions that have an offensive character / with a boomerang effect.

Conclusion: Your superiority in leadership depends largely, on one side, on the leader’s tact and tactics to establish relationships, on the other side, on people’s “quality” concerning their level of understanding, receptivity to change and how much they are “anchored” in reality. The work of a leader in terms of adult education is sometimes very difficult. He must have appropriate methods to change their thinking and mentality. Any unexpected intervention can result in total failure.

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