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The Monologue Of A Man Who Drags His Old Age

On October 15, 2012, in Total leadership, by Neculai Fantanaru

Mobilize your leadership potential to another way of being, without letting yourself dragged before by the roller of an uncontrolled evolution that promotes mediocrity.

I was sheriff of this district since I was 25. It is hard to believe. My grandfather was a man of the law. And my dad, too. I and him were sheriffs at the same time, he was in Plano, and I was here in Desert Aire. I think he's pretty proud of it. I was proud.

Some of the old-time sheriffs were not carrying guns. Many people find it hard to believe this. Jim Scarborough never carried a gun. That's the young Jim. Gaston Boykins would not carry one in Comanche County. I always liked to hear about those of the old times. I never missed a chance to do that.

You cannot compare yourself with the elders. I cannot help wondering how they do their job during those times.

Some time ago, in Huntsville, I sent a boy to the electric chair. It was my arrest and my testimony. He killed a girl of 14 years. The newspapers said it was a passionate crime, but he told me that there was no passion. He told me that he always wanted to kill someone. He said if he would be released, he would do it again. He said he knows he will go to hell. He would get there in 15 minutes.

I do not know what to think. I really do not know. I always knew you must be willing to die in order to do your duty. I think it's more about what you are willing to become. But, I do not want to risk anymore, and to meet something that I do not understand.

Also, I think a man should put his soul at stake. And I'm not in the condition to do this. Now I think maybe I was not ever.

I should say, "Well, I'll be a part of this world."

Leadership: Are you suffering an existential crisis marked by questions like "Why me?"

Towards where are heading, we, the elders, if not towards a fiercer inner poverty? It was wondering a hero of a short novel of spiritual formation.

The price to keep alive our energy is directly proportional with the area in which we operate and with our level of responsibility. The leadership can become in terms of these two considerations, a disappointment, an obstacle, an invitation to failure, a burdening ballast, a large area of items that begin to lose their meaning.

Like a star that fades before our eyes, leadership may lose its luster, turning itself from an advantage into a fault until its value reaches zero. A severe and decisive field, becoming increasingly harder to assimilate, under a very affordable form of "predestination and rejection" of illness and aging. The victim of a rupture between sustainability and development, unable to make a move of 90 degrees in the opposite direction on its axis, in order to get out of the "chess" given by time.

Are the new lights of the truth completing or clouding your judgment? The reason for which we decide to abandon the race towards excellence, consists in recognizing this impossibility of fulfilling the obligations incumbent on us, to know and fully understand the opponent of our own future: being part of a world that disappears little by little. It's about an existential crisis, with many questions about our purpose on earth.

The truth consists in recognizing who we are and who we are not at the point when we feel that we are losing control, when we become the prisoners of our own mediocrity.

Leadership: Being a part of this world means to give up a whole world for you?

The sheriff Ed Tom Bell from the movie "No Country for Old Men (2007)" told his monologue, contemplating with his soul and mind directed towards all those hidden things, half-locked in the obscure of a life that was running simultaneously on two fronts: of a destiny that must be fulfilled, and then of a farewell. He chose more the total abandonment in the mists of a sunset bathed by the prospect of death.

Like a hymn of despair, like an indictment, the sheriff's words reveal mercilessly the presses and the oppression of the society in which he lived, but also the symptoms of a job that he was no longer able to deal. Simply, his nature was no longer intersecting with the requirements, restrictions, with its trends. The old age, with all its additions, clenched him altogether. He was resigned for the imperceptible part that he rightfully belonged - the preparation for a future that will not ever live.

His help had to come "from above" from a higher consciousness, more lucid, from a healthier attitude, more attentive, more responsible, and more protective; from an active and meaningful existence. But, he was not in the position to recognize the remedies, and to manage them by alone, because he was no longer receptive to the social transformations.

What will happen with the foliage of an old tree cut from the root? The old age is a complicated realm that catches more and more ground, comprises your consciousness as a cold shroud, emphasizing your despair and fatigue.

Leadership: Is the whole expression of your personality accomplished through the subtle play of the conditions established by an implacable predestination, without resorting to incompatibilities with the limit of personal responsibility?

Is your nature intersecting with the requirements, restrictions, and the leadership’s trends?

As regards our beliefs and aspirations emanating from our ideal of tomorrow, from everything that means evolution and development (ideal, which can be perceived directly before the meaning and the rigors of existence) they represent the main factor in determining the level of self-confidence. A kind of cornerstones of predestination that do not break at the first storm, and to draw with it the entire structure of our life until then.

Both in terms of attitude and thinking, of the way in which we understand and build our life, as well as in terms of gradual and sustainable development, these beliefs and aspirations represent at the same time the reference frame of our entire transformation, provided by the contribution of all physical factors, psychological and social that are participating actively in achieving excellence.

Something so important since some of the prospective hypotheses - reproduced for the realism of the transformation process – are starting from the analysis of that reality with which we identify ourselves. That is why some of our fears and inconveniences, caused by the feeling of helplessness and the manifestation of unforeseeable, limit their validity depending on how we analyze and how we perceive the past and the future in relation to an implacable predestination.

The conditions established by an implacable predestination in the dark depths of a mind consumed are associated with the variable of relating to your own kind on the path towards the supreme ideal: that of crossing impassable barriers within the sphere of the experienced ordinary.

After a certain age there is a tendency of stagnation and decay, of abdication from the ideals that we have built in our youth. The future belongs to those leaders, who will keep permanently their spiritual youth, to those that continuously adapt to the constantly changing requirements of the society, to the technological changes, but especially the ones of mentality, adjusting their mode of action without abdicating from achieving the proposed goals.

This is the essence of youth without old age and life without death, a close and a lasting reference on what we actually are, like a flame that should be maintained as much as possible, most often powered by the positive trend of our activity. To participate with as much enthusiasm for everything we commit in life through leadership, because everything we will create, good or bad, will forever remain to our descendants.

The monologue of a man who drags his old age highlights that feature of the leaders who abandon their established leadership role and responsibility in relation with the life.

Just as in the old age, the man does not have the capacity of action that he had some years ago, so the leadership that we practice diminishes its meaning once with our involution in the big evolution of society and life.


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