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The Heart's Impulse

On October 11, 2010, in Successful Leadership, by Neculai Fantanaru

Keep intact your relationship with people, revealing them that detail of your character due to which they would accept your leadership.

I feel tempted – and I cannot resist the temptation to speak to you again, in this serene time of full autumn, about the famous character Count of Monte Cristo, from the famous eponym novel, written by Alexandre Dumas.

After the Count reached his goal – revenging on those who sent him to prison, where he was abandoned for many years – he decided to share his riches to his only friends, Maximilien and Valentine, and to restore Haydee's freedom, the daughter of the ruler Ali Pasa, whose life he saved, but who was a slave.

With an inquietude that he vainly tried to hide, Monte Cristo asked Valentine to take care of Haydee, for he shall go away, and she shall remain alone in the world.

Leadership: What delimits you and defines you as a personality must be lost in order to live an authentic experience of identification with someone else?

The time for the great attempt. Hearing this, Haydee, whose presence the Count did not feel at that moment, turned pale. She untied her diaphanous hands, as virgins do before God and, with tears in her voice, she said:

- Ok, your orders will be fulfilled, master. I am your slave and I will listen to you. I'll forget even your name and I’ll be happy. Then, she took a step back and got ready to go.

Hearing that woeful voice, which touched the most secret string of his heart, Monte Cristo shuddered. His eyes met the girl's look, and he could not bear what he saw in her eyes.

- Jesus Christ ! – Said Monte Cristo – so it may be true what you left me guess? Haydee, you would be happy if I didn't leave you?

- I'm young – she replied gently – I love the life you always made so enjoyable for me. And I would regret to die… Yes, I would die, my lord, I would die if you leave me. Then, rushing to his chest, she cried – Yes, I love you ! I love you like I would love my father, my brother, my husband ! I love you like I love my life, how I love God, because you are nicer, better and greater than all beings for me !

Leadership: Are the search results of an existential sense the sole assessment criterion of your value?

He was right, the one who said: "What delimits and defines you as a person must be lost in order to live an authentic experience of identification with someone else". Always remember you as you were before you merged with the role of another character !

Most often, in the appreciation of a man’s reference value, his search results of an existential sense are the sole assessment criterion. But this value is often distorted by the reality subject to tortuous conjunctures, to a mix of factors and situations aligned on the axis of consciousness independent of the inner world representations, in fine tune with discontinuances, oscillations and alternations between "to be" and "not to be".

But there are complex situations or twists, where partial or total success to get possession of an appreciation or loyalty evidence can be considered a valuable unconditioned income. That if the leader, as well as his supporters, give importance and value to spiritual, emotional and intellectual maturation amid an accumulation of daunting experiences.

Leaders, no matter their state and field of activity, are always conditioned by the amount of "light" in the deeper layers of their soul, constantly accompanied by the need to develop stable emotional bonds, motivated by the sense of unconditional belonging to family first and then to community, living life experiences that have the power of positive transformation.

It is very possible that they better understand the world precisely through these personalization or depersonalization phenomena, which will again and again put them in different situations until they learn healthy life lessons: forgiveness, giving up selfishness, releasing old wounds, relational healing, positive impact, gratitude and tolerance.

Your belonging to a broader understanding of reciprocity can be made by fulfilling the purpose of your existential nature and by abandoning the longing for what is above you.

Above you is an effort to overcome what hurts you, what ails you, what makes you distance yourself from the true values, what makes you hate yourself or what makes you plan a revenge.

These life lessons should be accepted as a normal fact, not necessarily as fundamental truths, but as a form of gain with better or worse results, required to life’s exam or admission in management. Small grades are always clear evidence that the leader’s positive transformation has not occurred or is not yet completed. And society gives great importance to the results of his evolution, hence the subjective character in certain situations, of success or failure in leadership.

The time that Monte Cristo wasted into a feverish desire for personal revenge, was replaced by one that was going to elapse "beyond the footlights" in the universe where he finds out his natural purpose, the one he coveted so much for in his youth, with someone apparently destined for his happy future.

Haydee's love made him forget what he had to. A single word of hers enlightened him more than all those years of wisdom acquired with Abbe Faria. Through her, he could feel connected to life again, through her, he could be happy again. The heart’s impulse gave him another ideal realm, replacing his conceptions about life.

Leadership: Are you confronted with the existence tendency to overcome conventional boundaries imposed by strict definitions of the idea of ​​seeing everything in terms of the humiliation you feel about everything that happens to you?

You can never penetrate the great mystery of leadership if you act against your own feelings. In spite of all your accomplishments, even if you have conquered your spectators, becoming one of their favorites, if you will not establish a lasting connection between you and them, you will destroy the bridge that you must pass by yourself. Then, do not leave these feelings fade, but often put them before the role you have to play.

Imagine that hundreds, thousands of people love you. They smile, their eyes sparkle, you brought joy into their souls. They want you, you belong to them. They enable you to regain your past and build a great future, getting excited with those shades of an active sensitiveness. Moreover, they inspire you the same gratitude and inner peace you inspired to them. That is the definite proof that they were blinded by the light irradiated from your seductive personality.

Your ability to lead is seen in the emotional reactions of the other people around you. Do you feel that your presence is part of them, and that is their half? Are you loved due to your sensitive nature, due to your receptive spirit, because of your beautiful manners of behaving, because of your particular charm of your genius, or due to the impulse of your heart?

Leadership captures the way you relate to what is happening so that the final gratitude will replace the original humility.

The heart’s impulse is that heart-stirring fire which represents you, which always accompanies you and affects your existence on all levels, personal, social, and professional. It is the time for the great attempt, when you establish a lasting connection with those around you. It is that something that engraves forever in other people's souls. It is the detail of your character, because of which they want to stay around you and even lean on you.

The heart’s impulse must sometimes precede the urge of the mind, in order for you to penetrate the great mystery of leadership, acting in accordance with what your heart dictates.

* Note: Alexandre Dumas - The count of Monte Cristo, Youth Publishing House, 1957.


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